* - - LOST FOR WORDS; Teddy

[Victoire Gabrielle Weasley]

IT'S A LONG WAY FOR HEARTBREAK
LET YOUR HEART WAIT AND BLEED
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

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Victoire never passed up a change to get all dolled up. This year, however, she had been fighting against depression. The idea of having to go to a party and see people (who constantly asked how she was) was appalling. With some urging from her mother and fellow Ministry workers, Tory made the pressured decision to go. She would go, make her appearance, have a drink or two - and then leave as early as she possibly good. Who knows, maybe she would surprise herself and have fun but, that was doubtful.

Three years ago, and then some, Ted Lupin left. With several weeks of persuasion, Tory managed to force it out of her Uncle Harry just where in the hell he went to. Apparently, he was offered a job elsewhere, and he took it. Just like that, he took it and left. Even though they hadn't been together when he left, Victoire was equally devastated and furious at him. They were still like best friends, even if she was still heartbroken from their dissolved relationship. She deserved at least a goodbye but, she didn't get that. For the first few months, Victoire was absolutely miserable. She went through a 'can't eat, can't sleep' stage. Slowly, it got a little better as she distracted herself with work but, even then there were things everywhere that reminded her of him. It was once suggested that she find a different career (mostly by her mother) but, she was bound and determined to become an auror. Now, she was and now, she was possibly worse than she was when he first left. Victoire was battling full blown depression, and there was nothing anyone could do to help her out of it.

So, now she was at this ball, sitting alone at a table, watching everyone else have fun. When she first arrived, she plastered a fake smile on her face and socialized. Now, everyone was off dancing, or gathering in small circles to laugh and talk together. Victoire was well aware that a few young men - who really wouldn't all that bad looking - had been eying her up, probably contemplating to ask her to dance or something. Their answer would be a definite no. She was in no mood to dance, or even be here anymore for that matter. She didn't want to go home either - to her desolate little apartment. Lately, Victoire had been spending a lot of time at home, with her parents, in her old bedroom. They both tried their hardest to make her feel better, and Tory let them try, even though nothing worked - she made them think it did, so they wouldn't worry.

Before she left, Victoire took her glass of champagne and joined a group of her old school friends. She slightly engaged herself in the conversation. Then, one of them asked her where Teddy Lupin had been hiding. The girl, who didn't know Victoire all that well, added that she thought they would have been married with a child or two by now. She put on a brave face and just said that she had no idea. He took a job somewhere and she hadn't heard from him since - which was true. Victoire strategically moved the conversation onto another girl in the circle, who was recently engaged and quite obviously flashing the ring awaiting some notice. She just wanted the conversation off of herself and him. Time was filled with the girlish giggles, hugs, and talks of wedding plans. Tory went so far as to put in her opinion in at several different points. In the end, she started to feel a little better knowing that at least someone in the world was happy. Once the conversations had settled, the girls parted, and Victoire went back to sitting alone at the table.

TAGS - t.r.l.
WORDS - 650
OUTFIT - pretty
LYRICS - your surrender - neon trees <3
GRAPHICS - my own self.
NOTES - =]

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[aems4]

Teddy didn't even know why he was here. First week back in town and he was spending his time in a dark area with flashing lights and loud music. The mountain air must have surely done something to his head. He circled around, picking up a bottle of muggle beer on his way passing by the bar. When it was all you had to supply the fog that would take away what you wanted to forget... you grew a certain fondness for it. But never had been much of a drinker. He wondered now if he had even more reason to drink. The stares he receiving in passing some of the people he used to know... it looked as if if he bothered to smile they would slap him, or at the very least ambush him with questions. But now that he was back he would have to face his problems. He could not just drown his conflicts in a drunken fog.

Sighing, Teddy sipped the cool bottle, ignoring yet another odd look from an old friend passing. He nodded, and continued walking, refusing to dance politely with a girl he had never met, and trying to ignore the way she looked at him. This time of year was supposed to be a happy time... supposed to be a celebration, but all the happiness that he had been missing, all of the cheer, and the talk and the smiles, seemed only to aggravate him. Allowing him to sink into one of his rarely seen moods.

He sank into a chair against the back wall. Tucking himself away from others. His eyes scanned the area automatically, auror instincts kicking in naturally. But those instincts quickly cut out. In front of him sat a light haired girl (the darkness hid her true hair color from his eyes), posture so familiar that it hurt. Even from behind he could recognize the light figure that he had known almost all his life. But... it almost seemed changed... He found himself already on his feet as his thoughts roamed further, but he stopped in his tracks. He had left her, without any warning, and not shown himself for 3 years. If any luck, she would recognize him and flip out at him. Otherwise he would seem like an unrecognizable creeper... and he was not entirely sure he had the heart to truly tell her who he was.

But she was the reason for his return. She was the reason he had come back, the source of all his conflicting thoughts and pain... the reason so many nights were spent threatening his own life with a drunken fog, when at any moment the very people he hunted by day... could come and ambush him at night. But she... she was the one he remembered. Through a dozen muggle beers... she was the reason why he literally knocked himself out some nights... just to get one night without painful memories, regret, and an odd sense of responsibility. Those emotions totaling with the real reason he had taken the job... The combination of all that... The pain of it all nagged at the core of him. And it never let go. Especially not now.

If he turned away and left without her noticing, he knew his conscience would count that as the second time he walked away from her. Teddy knew he would regret it. After all... he had tried running, tried thinking. There was no possible amount of time that would solve this conflict for him. Regardless if he didn't know how this was going to work, what he was going to do... or any other small or large detail... he had to plunge in, headfirst. Dive, or forever hold your peace. As there would never be peace... He dove.

In three strides he was behind her. A moment's hesitation, and his hand rested lightly on her arm. A whisper escaped his mouth, one he had not even realized until he said it... one that was meant for her and her alone. "Im home Victoire"

Tags: V.W.
Words: 686
Notes: Fallen in love with my own char... is that bad? =P

[Victoire Gabrielle Weasley]

IT'S A LONG WAY FOR HEARTBREAK
LET YOUR HEART WAIT AND BLEED
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

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Victoire transfixed her eyes on her glass of champagne. She watched the tiny bubbles rise up to the top and soundlessly fizzle to nothing. It was almost like her. She used to be bubbly and bright all the time, and then all that fizzled into the useless lump of a girl she was now. It was hard to watch everyone else have fun, smile and pretend you are enjoying yourself when all you really want to do is curl up in bed and just die. That was how she felt. Dead. The only thing that kept her alive was her parents, brother, sister, nephew, and the newest little second cousins. Still, they would all get along fine without her after awhile. Victoire could never imagine taking a life, much less her own. She had thoughts about it but, would never actually act upon them.

The past three or four years had been hard on her. This past year had been worse than the other three. Tory, under the constant urging of her mother sought help. She had weekly trips to a psychologist. It cost a good chuck of change but, as it turns out her parents were paying for part of it. At first, Tory hadn't known about that, after a few weeks she figured it out. Talking to someone, outside her circle of family and friends, helped. Although she was "discovering" her problems - she had already known what her problem was. Teddy was gone, her heart was shattered, her world just ended. She felt like she didn't have a world to live in without him. There was the huge void everywhere she looked. A space which he used to fill. Victoire no longer felt...anything except emptiness. It was like a Dementor just sucked out her soul but, some how she was still alive and able to walk around.

Social interaction is necessary to start getting better. The words of her therapist echoed in her mind. Well, she came, she saw, she interacted, now she could go. Vic sighed, and decided to finish her champagne first. She didn't get it much. It saddened her slightly to drink it though. Back when Victoire was still dating Teddy, and before then even, she planned on having champagne at her wedding. Teddy had nothing to do with that really...except for the fact Tory really thought well, knew that one day she would marry him. There wasn't anyone else in the world for her. She tried to date other people but, it never worked. The others weren't what she wanted. Vic had resolved to either have Ted, or no one at all.

Vic suddenly felt a all too familiar presence behind her. She had felt it many times before, and what she hoped was there never was. It was just her memories playing tricks on her. At least, that's what she told herself time and time again. This time was no different. she merely brushed it off as nothing and didn't bother turning around. Then, she felt a touch. The touch she had dreamed about for four years, the only one she ever wanted to feel. No, this was all in her head. It wasn't really happening. It was the champagne, it was making her hallucinate or something. She'd had too much - she always was a light weight. Then came a whisper - I'm home Victoire - in the voice she knew and missed. Surely she was just day dreaming.

Tory froze. The room froze. She was afraid to turn her head, and look and find it was all really in her head. If he wasn't there, she'd just be letting herself down again. If he was there, what would she say? What would she do? Part of her wanted to just beat the crap out of him but, she wouldn't really. It was just a thought. In all honestly, she had no idea what she would do exactly. Slowly, like in slow motion slow, Vic turned her head slightly and looks down. His hand was there. She turned her head her head a little more, and followed up and arm. Turning slightly in her chair, she saw that the arm was connected to a torso, a neck, and a head.

Victoire's heart fluttered, and practically stopped. For a full three minutes she stared, looking like she was face to face with a ghost. She was unaware by the whispers of her old school mates, who had been coming towards her to join in conversation once more. They backed off quietly, staring at the old sweethearts. Tory didn't see them, she didn't hear them. She didn't see anything except the person she was staring at. Vic was trying to determine if this was real, if any of it was. She didn't know what to say. Victoire Gabrielle Weasley was, for once in her life, lost for words.

TAGS - t.r.l.
WORDS - 828 !
OUTFIT - pretty
LYRICS - your surrender - neon trees <3
GRAPHICS - my own self.
NOTES - this is like my longest post in like ages. <3 I might end up writing a fan fic with this thread...or something. XD

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[aems4]

Her body froze underneath the warmth of his hand. He hesitated, and panic surged through him. She didn't remember. She hated him. She would turn around and slap him... for something she either didn't remember, or something that he deserved. Silence seemed to envelope the whole room, a mute button pressed as time passed slowly, a slow motion movie scene. Seconds passed, they felt like hours. But slowly, she turned. Their eyes met, and his heart seemed to hurtle a jump that he seemed have anticipated for too long. His heart lurched, and his breathe caught. She stared. And stared.

Dimly aware of the muted voices whispering, he saw their forms move toward them out of the corner of his eye, and then scuttle away, heads bent together in that girlish form guys would never understand. His nerves deepened at the odd reaction of their old school friends, and he shifted weight on each of his legs. Fidgeting nervously, Teddy just wished she would say something. Give some inkling of what she is thinking... or... well, SOMETHING. Instead, the silence grew.

He thought better than to speak, it would only trigger an explosion... one that needed time to either build or diffuse. Fact #508 that guys needed to know about girls. Give them time... it will all come out eventually. But his nerves were still growing, the music beginning to filter in through the futile attempts of the mute button. The whispers of old schoolmates and random people alike began to add to the tension. He could not wait much longer. If there was an explosion he deserved it. But she didn't deserve the humiliation. Only he did.

He nodded lightly towards the door, making his intention clear. IF she knew who he was, she would get his drift. He was merely acknowledging that they needed to talk. He had always found in pointless to make more drama by bursting in front of other people who had nothing to do with it. But time had separated them, and he wondered vaguely if she would trust him enough to be alone with him... especially if she didn't remember him. "We wont go far." He assured her quietly. "Unless... Like, we can stay here... If you would rather..." He shrugged, his voice fading off. He rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly. What 3 years out of society's constant company could do to you...

Tags: Guess who?
Words: 406
Notes: LOVE LOVE LOVE them together <33 I look forward to this thread now =P And a little shorter post... but my muse was somewhat fading.

[Victoire Gabrielle Weasley]

IT'S A LONG WAY FOR HEARTBREAK
LET YOUR HEART WAIT AND BLEED
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

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Of all the times she had dreamed about this moment, maybe not in this exact setting, Victoire knew what she had wanted to ask, what to say. Now that she was actually in this moment everything she wanted to say completely left her head. All of a sudden, Victoire became aware of all the eyes on them. She gave a sideways glance around them and blushed slightly. Who knew, after all this time out of Hogwarts, everyone still acted like they were in school. It was still embarrassing.

Tory's eyes found their way back to Teddy, as he nodded toward the door. They couldn't avoid the fact that a talk was necessary. A very long talk. Whether that talk would be a joyous one or sad, neither could know. Victoire knew on her part that some crying would be invovled. She nodded slowly, still unable to utter a word, and rose from her chair. Vic took on sweeping look across the room. Yes, there they were whispering in a huttled circle. This told her that she wasn't dreaming, this was all real. He was really home.

Wordlessly, Victoire walked to the doorway, through it and down the corridor a little ways from the party. She turned on heel, looking at Ted with a furious look which was soon clouded by tears. Well, that whole crying bit didn't take long. The furious look gave way to something much different. She didn't know whether to hug him or punch him the arm, or both. "I thought...I thought I wouldn't.." Victoire shook her head, unable to really complete her sentence. She hoped he knew what she meant. As of late, she really thought she'd never see him again.

TAGS - t.r.l.
WORDS - 291
OUTFIT - pretty
LYRICS - your surrender - neon trees <3
GRAPHICS - my own self.
NOTES - yeeaaahh....I got lazy so it's short.

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[aems4]

He paused as she rose and walked ahead of him. Fear gripping him. There was no way he could turn back now. MOVE. YOUR. FEET!! Slowly, almost sloth-like, his body followed his mental command, walking a few paces behind her. There was no denying they needed this, SHE needed this... (he) needed this, but regardless of that knowledge Teddy still felt like an invisible rope was trying to pull him back.

The rope snapped as he reached the doorway, bringing him out of the slow motion movie scene he had been hovering in. His heart froze and then melted. The look on her face as she turned from him... There was no amount of words that could possibly describe how it made him feel. One thought... She hates me. Guilt ripped through him as he caught the glint of a small tear slipping down her face as she walked a few faces more ahead of him. Just inside the hallway, he hesitated, the music still drifting into his only half-listening ears. The look on her face was a combination of a death glare and a face that said 'hold me or i will collapse'. But which one she was leaning towards... Its was beyond him. Too long they had been apart. He smacked himself mentally. Too long.

The unseen bruises seemed to seep into view, thoughts that he had pushed into the back of his mind for so long... they shot to the foreground of his mind. Her whisper... it broke open the box he kept filling and shoving closed. Breaking open in an explosion of emotions. He didn't care what she did to him, long term or short term. All he needed at that moment was to take all she was feeling into him. He stepped forward without thinking, covering the space between them in less than a few strides. Taking her in his arms as if she were about to collapse. Realizing his lips were moving in a barely audible whisper. "...'m sorry... so sorry... don't care... happens... let me... sorry..." He had never been so vulnerable, but he didn't care. It was just her and him. Whether it stayed like that... that would all depend on her. For now, all he cared about was her, and how much he wanted to erase the past that he had screwed up so much.


Tags:Vic <33
Words:399
Notes:Short but cute ^^

[Victoire Gabrielle Weasley]

Tears welled up and spilled out of her eyes. Victoire melted into a pile of emotional garbage when Teddy took a hold of her. That was what she needed to make her realize that he really was here. This wasn't just some stupid hallucination. Tory buried herself against him. The old familiar feelings of comfort and safety flooded her, adding into everything. Victoire had always felt safe with Ted. He managed to always make things better. Even though she was mad at him, she couldn't stay that way.

She stood like that with him for several minutes. Victoire was almost afraid to move, in case he just went poof. She needed a few minutes to just soak in the fact that he was actually here. Victoire pulled her head back so she could look up at his face. She needed to see him up close. Vic moved one hand up, placing it on his cheek. She smiled slightly, tracing the familiar lines of his face with her eyes. "I didn't think I'd ever see you again," she said, finally being able to finish her sentence from before.

"Where...where were you?" she asked softly. Where he went to and why he left were the top two questions on her mind. Victoire had been holding out for this day, the day that he might come back. Slowly, she had lost all hope. Ted has been the only man Tory had ever truly loved. Sure, there had been others but they didn't match up. Her heart was his. Things weren't really all that different now. Victoire could no longer deny the fact that she would take him back in less than a heartbeat. All that had happened to her emotionally over the years could be overcome. Teddy would just have to do a lot of making up to her.

tags: ted
words: beats me
notes: kinda a sucky post.

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[aems4]

Words choked him, allowing no air to come in, nor escape. He felt as if his very skin went blue. Not that question. Of all questions... not that one, not now. He knew her grasp was too good to be true. He held on to her for a moment more, then slid his face away from her shoulder in which he had duck in deep. They supported each other, in stance and in emotions. And when one came tumbling down the other was not too far behind. And her first rock had fallen.

An avalanche of emotions came tumbling down, tears welled up, but he forced them to clear. What on earth could he tell her? He was gone on a mission of the ministry? A suicidal mission only he, in his damaged state would take? He stared into her eyes, seeing the pain that reflected his own. "I..." He faded off, unable to tell a single more lie, and yet unable to speak the truth. "I-I cant lie anymore..." He hung his head, heaving a heavy sigh. "But... its hard to break the past." He knew she wouldn't know what the hell he was talking about. But he couldn't just say nothing. He raised his head slowly, still gripping her shoulders for a shaky support. He tried to straighten, but failed. The weight of his emotions too heavy, and too confused to bother with anything physical.

Teddy dropped his hands as he began to shake, not wanting her to feel how much he trembled. "Vic... Victoire," He corrected himself. "A-all that matters is im back. It will all come into the light... just. not. today. not... now." He shook his head, his voice fading to barely a whisper, his voice cracking. "Im so sorry." He hesitated, "And i know it doesn't matter the extent of that word... but i wanted you to know." He faded into a swaying silence that brought his knees almost to a collapsing point. He locked them in a last final attempt to keep her from seeing his weakness. Keep her from seeing that SHE was his weakness. But his knees met concrete in a painful snap, his hands collecting together in his lap, face hanging.

He was supposed to be the one to hold her. But without her in his arms... without her as his support, just as he was hers... their foundation broke. And after all the years... it had crumbled into something he was not sure she would ever help him fix. And he hated himself more for that, then the fact that this was more weakness he had EVER allowed her to see in the countless years they had known each other.

Tags:<3
Words: 458
Notes: Sorry if thats confusing. Im tired.

[Victoire Gabrielle Weasley]

When Tory didn't get her answer right away, she just knew something was wrong. Something was very wrong. She looked up at him, and touched his cheek. All she hoped for was a smiple answer, and she got this big emotional answer. It confused her really. Victoire had no clue what he meant by all that, and let her hand drop slowly as he retracted his own hands. She was flooded with concern, and guilt for being so mad at him. Here he was, practically falling apart in front her, and she yelled at him earlier nearly.

Victoire had never seen Ted like this before. In all their years as friends and up until this very moment, she'd never seen him so shaken up. She had to wonder what he had gone through while he was away. Victoire didn't have a clue about any of it. One thing was clear, he didn't voluntarily leave her. It all made sense now. Teddy must have been sent on some top secret mission that was only known between him and a few other higher up people.

In this moment she forgot about everything else and just concentrated on him. Victoire sat on her knees on the ground, knowing her dress was going to probably get dirty. She stretched out her arms and pulled him close to her, attempting to console him for whatever was wrong. Victoire knew she couldn't be mad at him anymore. It was pointless. She couldn't deny the fact that she loved him. The world was worth living in knowing that Ted was back alive. Vic's heart broke to see him like this. Something in him was broken, something in her was broken. They had to fix each other because without the other, they would remain broken.

Victoire sighed, searching for the right thing to say. She couldn't think of anything that would fit the situation. Tory sat there in silence for several minutes, just holding him close to her, hoping that that could at least comfort him a little bit. "Why don't we go to my place hm? I'll make us some tea and we can just....talk or not talk, that would be fine to," she suggested with a small smile. As much as she wanted to know where he had been and what he had been doing, it seemed that it was hard for him to say it. Maybe it was just something that took time. Heck, they were going to have to take time to sort out their relationship, or fix what was left of it, whether that be their friendship or otherwise.

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[aems4]

Shock rippled through him as a single tear dropped onto the concrete below, reflecting the motion of Victoire's dress as she knelt down beside him. He didn't dare look into her eyes. His hands trembled, and he gripped them together, willing them to stop. But no matter how much he wished it... they continued their jerking spasm. And it only intensified as she took him into her arms, something that somehow didn't feel right to him. What happened to the anger? The confusion? The spark of invisible misgivings? And why the hell was he not holding her? It should be the other way around... it should be- But teddy's body would not respond to him. It shook, and he felt the waves of shame drowning him as he knew she felt each tremble.

They sat in silence. Absorbed in their own thoughts and overpowering feelings. The only emotion left in the air between them was raw hurt. Raw pain. Raw confusion. It was as if wounds had been reopened with a dull knife... the smell of blood and regret in the air. He swallowed slowly, knowing full on that pure bloody smell... He shook those gruesome thoughts away. They only pried open the box of memories further. The memories of the trip he wished he had never taken. He hated the weakness he felt inside of him. Hated the weakness that caused him to run in the first place. Hated the weakness that had brought him to this trembling mess that he no longer had any control over. Hated the woman who made him weak. But loved her too much to stay away. A black hole he was destined to fall into, and never get out.

He lifted his eyes to her face for the first time in a long time as she spoke. He hesitated, then nodded a single time, and gripped her in his arms. No longer the boy, he rested his chin on her head and swayed slowly. Some amount of pride regained, he stared out into the clouds that passed overhead. Was he ready to be back where he belonged? Was he ready to be back in her house, just like the old days? But he swallowed his worries and swallowed his tears. "On your signal." He gripped her arm in his hand, and squeezed it tight. The past was the past. It was time to move on. No worries of the past. Forget the pain. Drink the god damned tea, and move on. Funny how it sounded easier when you said it.

Tags: la da la da di da
Words: 431
Notes: Huh. Kinda dark. Sowwy <3 lol

[Victoire Gabrielle Weasley]

Seeing Teddy just...fall apart made everything go away. Her angry feelings just dissolved. The years of her own emotional pain seemed suddenly childish. There was more to this falling apart business that Victoire knew. She couldn't imagine what had brought Ted into trembling state. It couldn't be just her. Tory had learned, when she had sought counseling, that there are often underlying reasons. She learned that when bad things happen, people try to pretend like everything's fine until they crack and have to face the ugliness they were trying to forget.

Vic held onto Teddy tightly, trying to comfort him like she would for a scared child who woke up from a nightmare. She sucked in all her own tears for herself, and kept her tears for him inside too. Tory just knew, call instinct if you want but, she knew and could feel that he seemed..almost different. Something happened to him, something he couldn't forget even if he wanted to. Maybe that's what caused him to melt into a trembling mess. Victoire had seen horrible things herself, like that Lestrange character and someone else just ripping poor muggles to piles of mush. She knew how that gave her nightmares. In those moments of horror, she had longed for Ted to be there. Instead, she was confident, brave, and got herself nearly killed. Somehow, she couldn't remember how but, she made it out of that situation alive. Victoire had forgotten all about that until now. She wondered what horrible things he had gone through, she could only assume it was something. That trip to wherever he went on had more to do with just their relationship. There was more she didn't know, and she was beginning to think she didn't want to know but, she had to.

It was clear to her that they both had their dark places. If he loved her, the same way she loved him, they could fix it...together. They could fix each other. It wouldn't happen overnight but, they couldn't deny that they needed each other. Victoire gave him a slight smile when he looked at her. She wished she had some special ability to take away this pain that he felt. She didn't, that probably might not even be possible anyway. The thought was there and that's what counted.

Tory nodded slowly, and waiting a moment before she rose from the ground, helping Ted up with her. She glanced down from the dress, brushing off dust and dirt from the floor. It was nothing that wouldn't come out with a good cleaning. "Maybe we could both use something a little stronger than tea," she said lightly, trying to ligthen the mood just a little bit. The air felt thick with the pain and confusion that was between them. It made it nearly hard to breath. Victoire kept thinking that any second now she was going to wake up and this had all been a dream. No, it wasn't. He was really here, with her and he was alive. Her thoughts of him possibly being dead somewhere just seemed so ridiculous now but, where there? Victoire looked at him, and concern and worry ran across her features. She was worried about him.

She sighed. Her small flat was across town. "Should we apparate?" Victoire didn't feel very much like walking all that way, or taking something other slow source of transportation. She wasn't sure if Teddy even had the strength to apparate. If he didn't, she knew she could do it - transport both of them. Besides, she knew the location and he didn't. Without waiting for Ted to answer, she disapparated them.

TAGS - t.r.l.
WORDS - 609
NOTES - i like dark.

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