Post by sachie on Aug 1, 2010 0:33:51 GMT -5
Jakob felt like reminiscing. Life to him had unexpectedly proved itself to be nothing special lately, contrary to what he would have thought. Knowing that Kiran liked him and she knowing that she was considered in the same light (brighter, even) by him should have made like exciting! After all; his fellow class mate was anything but a dull one. Every day should be shining, amazing, adventurous.
And yet it was not. Mostly because unfortunately and for no good reason it seemed like the two of them didn't get to socialize as often as they would have liked. But also because, half the time, Jake wasn't feeling too hot inside.
It made him feel weak and womanish to admit it, but the guy was lonely. Kiran was beautiful and adored, had so many friends. He himself was well enough liked and more or less popular with the ladies, but he kept to himself a lot and even if he hadn't, the only one for him was dear, darling Kiran. Being lonesome was Jakob's own fault for spending so much time alone instead of out and about with his house mates, there was no doubt about that. However, even though he could pinpoint the problem that caused this effect, that was something whole different than being able to change it.
The blond moped (even as doing so served to feel as if it were compromising his macho-ness even more) at the location of the North Tower, pacing around and around the place's private perimeter. There was nobody else there at the moment, a something Jake liked. The tower had long provided a hide out for him, somewhere he could go if he wanted to be out and get some fresh air but continue, like usual lately, to be alone. It was a rather nice place to be and helped to calm his raging, unhappy spirit and nerves, and even that department not completely.
Jakob really didn't know why he currently and so often felt unhappy. It felt to him inside like he was alone, no one in the world to depend on, besides Kiran. And even her he had been distancing himself from unnecessarily. Responsibility for his two siblings felt like a heavy weight that the Slytherin wasn't sure how to carry, and even they weren't doing the bests they could have to let him know that they loved him and appreciated his efforts. Jakob needed to feel nurtured and be reassured of that he was doing things right in order to prosper and grow; something he wasn't getting in abundance.
He'd come out here to be alone, this was true. And yet, Jake was sure he wouldn't mind in the least if Kiran were to show up and they were to strike up a conversation. Maybe she would even grant him with a kiss...