whats going on {harry

[ginny]

Ginny didn't really know what to think when she came home to see a hole in the house. Her jaw dropped at the site. What was she meant to do with a hola in the house? In lilys room for that matter. She wanted to know what was going on but the house seemed deserted. She gulped the sickening feeling down. She could only expect the worse right? After all that her and harry went through that was how she turned out to be. Expecting the worse around ever corner, but most of the time they were lucky. Lucky to be the patially happy family, but things had started slipping.

She stepped into the empty house, wondering whether to search the wreckage or wait for harry to come home. She glance at the clock her mother passed down to her. It kept track of where the family were. Ginnys status returned to home, James Albus and Roula were at school, both harry and lily were unknown. She shrugged it off. perhaps the charms were finally starting to weaken on the clock. She took her cloak off and hung it up, before walking down the room only to see the daily prophet sat on the table. She only had to look at the front page for her mouth to drop. People had found out? About Lily? She had thought Albus was making it up, but now she wasn't so sure.

[harrypotter]

Harry stumbled up the driveway to the house. He hadn't slept all night, and well really couldn't with Dom shoveling loads of information down his throat. Just the night before he had caught her and Lily both fighting in the back bedroom, which use to be Lily's. He had walked in and told Dom to go home while he talked to Lily, but talking to Lily was impossible. Instead, it turned into a duel. A duel that had pitted Harry against his own flesh and blood, and in the end, cause him to kill her and knock a giant hole in the back wall of the bedroom. As he walked to the front door all he could do was pray that Ginny was home.

He walked in, shutting the door behind him. The house seemed empty, but yet he felt as if someone was there waiting on him. Walking through the front hall he passed the charmed clock, taking a quick glance at it. Lily was moved into the unknown, while Harry's hand moved from beside Lily to beside Ginny at the Home spot. His eyes widened and he ran through the house. "Ginny!" he called out, running down the hall, finally finding her standing by a Daily Prophet which sat by the table. His eyes filled with tears he couldn't speak. He walked over to her wrapping his arms around her, now crying. After a few moments all he could choke out was, "She's dead..."

[ginny]

Albus had told her that Lily was a death eater, and well of course being Ginny she refused to believe one of her own was something as disgusting and low as that. Her and Harry had brought them up the same way, being on the good side. No dark magic or anything, so why was lily so different from it all? Truth was, she wasn't she was like all her other children but maybe a little more misunderstood. But clearly the daily prophet decided to snoop up the story and broadcast it to the world. She was furious, and wished to speak to Lily about the matter.

She heard footsteps and as she glanced up she was pulled into a tight hug. Harry! She held him back, not wanting to let go. Inhaling the scent she had missed. It had been a little while since they last spoke. They both seemed on two opposite ends of the world being busy within the ministry. He said two words she dreaded to hear. she's dead harry was crying, she froze up. "Who's dead?" she said holding back tears for whomever they were for. And for some reason she had a feeling it was lily. Her heart was about to smash into a million small pieces.

[harrypotter]

He felt warm arms wrap themselves around him and for a moment he felt like nothing had happened, that this was just a normal day and he was getting to see his wife at long last from work, but as soon as she asked Who's Dead? the feeling went away and he pulled away from the hug, his hands now resting on her shoulders. He all of a sudden had a great surge of strength, but could still feel the sadness dwelling within him. He had to be strong for Ginny, had to be so she didn't break all the way down. "Lily is dear..." he said, all the warmth in his voice gone. Reality hit him like a pelt of ice and he was instantly frozen to his spot in the floor, waiting for Ginny to slump down into his arms and break down.

He gathered his strength as he held her close, knowing that his ass was probably going to be grass in a matter of moments. "I had come home last night after researching Jack Lestrange, the Hogwarts Defense teacher," he told her rubbing her back. "I heard fighting in the house, so i stormed in and found Bill's daughter Dom and Lily in the bedroom, cursing each other. Lily casted the killing curse, and I managed to get Dom out of the way. I sent Dom home and tried talking to Lily....but our Lily isn't there Ginny.." Harry was now starting to breakdown himself as he realized all this once again. "She tried to kill me....I tried to take her in...I didn't want her to die...she told me she didn't want me as a father, she'd rather see me die...so after i dodged her curse I fired my own out of anger...The back wall blew up and..." He was now in full tears trembling. "I think I killed her..."

[ginny]

She surely felt her heart stop beating. It felt like she couldn't breath. She hoped he wouldn't say her name, not any of her childrens either. Lily. Lily her darling little daughter... dead? It was unreal. She wished it was some sick joke. Her heart split. She might have been one of the strongest women around but it felt like she had lost fred all over again. And this time it wasn't a brother. It was her own baby girl. The one she'd raised up. She taken her too the school for the first time, stopped her brothers from teasing her too much. Offered reassurance. She was gone. Just like that. She went numb. Taking it all in, preparing for her breakdown. She could feel the stinging tears building up their barrier, and she knew once she started it was doubtful she would stop. "lily..." was all she managed to say.

She didn't want to listen but forced herself too. Lily had become a bad person, and she couldn't get out. Ginny would have understood. She'd been made to open the chamber of secrets, nearly killing herself in the process. She had had her taste of the dark side, and once it swallowed you up, it was hard to get out. But then she had Harry to save her. He stopped her from drowning. Now who was there to save Lily if they both couldn't. Well they couldn't now could they. She was dead. Tears finally broke through and she collapsed into harrys arms. before she had chance to ask whom did it, he already said. he did it. shock shot straight back through. "You killed lily?" she muttered in disbelief pulling away from him. "You murdered our baby girl? How could you!? "

[harrypotter]

Harry felt her pull herself away from him, pushing him back a little. He looked at her, tears in his eyes as he tried to explain it all. "No! You don't understand!" Harry said, backing away from her slowly. He felt like an outcast, like he had betrayed his own family, not Lily. "She was going to kill me! She told me she'd rather be dead than my daughter Ginny! She sat there and threatened to kill us all! Dom told me she did! She joined the other side and said I was dead to her." His back was now against the front door as he slipped slowly down it to his butt, sitting on the hardwood flooring.

"I wanted to take her in Ginny! But after all she said! And then she tried to kill me! But mine backfired or something! I don't feel like she's gone but I can't find her body either...." He was now looking at the ground, his tears running dry. He knew it was probably no hope in explaining it all. Lily wanted him to kill her. She wanted to go down in flames and she knew the way to do it. It was because of her now that the family was really going to fall apart, that Ginny would probably leave Harry, thinking that he was a murder. It made no sense though what happened with the curse. There was always a body, always one. This time though there was a hole in a wall and no body. It made no sense! Maybe Ginny would see that.

[ginny]

It was hard to come to terms with it all. When you lost a child a part of you goes with it. Ginny could feel just how heartbroken her mother was with the loss off fred. She felt short of breath. Dizzy. Every emotion in the world hitting her in one blow, each over powering the other. That little girl that used to run through the very house they were stood in was now a memory. There would be no return of her from school. She'd have to break it to the family. A bomb was about to go off. Death eater or not, it was still her lily. That girl meant the world to ginny, and now she was gone curtosey of the father. She needed the world to stop. To give her a break. She didn't want anything to do with anything. She wanted Lily. She wanted to hug, kiss and tell her everything was ok. But it wasn't, she couldn't and she never would be able too.

"Why Lily?! Why?" she cried in hysterics. Why was this happening to her family. "I understand but... why kill her?! there were plenty more spells to bring her to her senses. She didn't mean them. Those things she said, anything. She was fifteen years old! I think i'd be in a confused state if i was a death eater at fifteen! What if bellatrix had her under the influence? What if Jack Lestrange was controlling her? Didn't you think!?" she flipped out of him. Shock had passed, anger was here and all she wanted to do was hit harry. She swore to her mother she would protect her children, and yet one of them had already suffered their fate. "Oh so you blew her to pieces like what happened with Peter Pettigrew. Because that makes it all the fucking better" she said, her firey temper rising up. She knew she shouldn't fight him. He meant well, and soon enough she sat beside him hugging her knees and leaning her head on his shoulder. "Im sorry." she said softley. It was a big dent in life when your baby girl dies.

[harrypotter]

Lily wasn't dead to Harry. He would have never disowned her if she was still alive, even now he didn't disown her. She was still part of the family to him death eater or not, and now, as he sat his back against the door, he couldn't feel a thing. He had gone totally numb for the first time since Lily had showed up to break the news, that was two whole weeks ago. He hadn't slept nor ate a day since she was on the doorstep of the house, and he knew he wouldn't eat or sleep in another fifty. Did he care? No. All he wanted was to be able to turn back time and stop himself from blowing her up into bits. If only she would have listened to him from day one. He would have already had her and the family halfway across the world in a safe place, making Ron secret-keeper and starting up the Order again with his sons.

Now Ginny was going off, just like he feared, and he knew his temper would soon show. "I understand but... why kill her?! there were plenty more spells to bring her to her senses. She didn't mean them. Those things she said, anything. She was fifteen years old! I think i'd be in a confused state if i was a death eater at fifteen! What if bellatrix had her under the influence? What if Jack Lestrange was controlling her? Didn't you think!?" Harry was mad now. "OF COURSE I DID! I'VE BEEN THINKING FOR THE PAST TWO WEEKS SINCE HER ASS WAS ON OUR DOORSTEP TELLING ME WHAT SHIT SHE WAS IN!!!!" He looked up at her, his eyes glazed with cold fear. "I did my best as her father to protect her. She refused to accept and kept pushing me away. Hell, she almost killed me and Albus both a few days ago in the Hog's Head, all because Albus had talked to Dom! So when she failed to me my daughter and accept my help, I failed to be her father. So my Auror side kicked in.""Oh so you blew her to pieces like what happened with Peter Pettigrew. Because that makes it all the fucking better" He just looked at her, now unable to speak. He watched as she came over and sat beside him, laying her head on his shoulder, apologizing. He just starred off into the distance, unable to feel the warmth of her face. "Don't apologize." Harry spoke softly, 'You're not the one who failed this family..."

[ginny]

Ginny calmed herself down. She needed to pull herself together. She was going to have to tell everyone by owl. She couldn't face anyone. Not now. She wouldn't go work in the morning and she guessed they would have to figure out how to sort out the house and then pull albus, james and roula out of school. She just wanted the family to feel complete again, she wouldn't let this push them away. She wanted this to bring them closer, make them stronger. It was a sad time, but she didn't want anymore distruction to cause harm to Harry or her children. He did was he had thought best, she as his wife was meant to stick by him. She was angry for what he did, but she knew how Lily was too. She was stubborn, and heaven knows what could have been going through her mind. She was better of dead. She doubted she would sleep tonight. Or anymore.

How was she going to cope? How would Al James and Roula cope? Of course, they just would. Children coped better. Ginny felt like she was falling apart. She wished this never happened, Lily was always one to rebel, or to do something stupid and to come running she was even pregnant. That made it by far worse, it was two birds with one stone. An accident so to speak. Harry would never have layed a finger on his children unless he had too. She only wished she could take lilys place.She heard him snap back. Two weeks he had landed with her, and Ginny couldn't even remember the last time she spoke to her daughter. Tears were still streaming down. No one even had a chance to say goodbye. "You've never failed to be anything harry. Lily got misguided and if she pushed you so far, then there wasn't much we could have done. Maybe this was her prophecy, or maybe they didnt even see it coming. Who knows. I really want to hope that she's still around. We almost always find a body, but this could just be one of those times where there is nothing left." she spoke quietly, but to the point. "Don't think you failed the family. Lily did. She made her choices,and sure they were wrong but there would have been nothing more that you, me, al, james or anyone else could do. We could only have guided her. When do we tell the kids....what do we do?"

[harrypotter]

It was of no use now. Harry knew damn right that he had failed Lily, already came to that conclusion with Dom at Bill and Fleur's house last night. He knew it was just what Bellatrix and Jack wanted, one slip up from the Potters, but not Ginny or the others, just Harry, and he had given it to him. He knew by tomorrow Jack would have heard about the death of Lily by the hands of her own father and would have ran to the media with it. Oh how Hermione would love that. Would she be understanding like she was so many times before? What about Ron? What about their kids? Was a funeral to be held with no body to be found? All these thoughts ran through Harry's mind like a freight train running off track, crashing and mixing with what was left of his emotions.


"You've never failed to be anything harry. Lily got misguided and if she pushed you so far, then there wasn't much we could have done. Maybe this was her prophecy, or maybe they didnt even see it coming. Who knows. I really want to hope that she's still around. We almost always find a body, but this could just be one of those times where there is nothing left." Ginny was telling him. It didn't make any sense. She had to be alive if there was no body! Harry had seen that curse used one too many times in his life to know that it just stopped the heart, not blow a whole body into oblivion. He got chills as he even thought about when it happened to him. No pain, just a sudden feeling of ice, then warmth, then nothing. His thoughts snapped back as she spoke once again. "Don't think you failed the family. Lily did. She made her choices,and sure they were wrong but there would have been nothing more that you, me, al, james or anyone else could do. We could only have guided her. When do we tell the kids....what do we do?"

Harry looked away from her for a moment, trying to gather his thoughts into the right place, but it was almost impossible. "Pull the kids out for the week, I'll send an owl to that filth of a headmaster they've got running the school. He said, rather calmly. "No more than a week though. I've found out through all this trouble that Bellatrix has a Horcrux, a living one like myself. They speak of a boy now, a boy who is tied into all this like I once was through a prophecy, though I haven't had a chance to go tot he Ministry about it all. I told Dom last night that when her and the kids go back to school they needed to start up the D.A. again, maybe this will catch the eye of the boy and bring him into sight." He sighed a bit, and then leaned his head onto hers wrapping his arm around her.

"Ginny..." he spoke softly. "I love you..."

[ginny]

The bad side might have won one over but good would always triumph over evil. No matter what, they would win this war. There was too much at stake to loose it, after all she had just lost her daughter she wouldn't loose anyone or anything else. Over her dead body of course, and now she felt it her and Harrys problem to save those that needed it. There was still that gaping hole in her heart but she could already begin to feel it heal. Would she have to have a funeral? Ginny didn't want to bring that up. It hurt to think she had outlived her young daughters life.

Sure it didn't make sense that there was nothing left of lily. But then there was still the mysterious blue light that harry claimed shot off beside the one he had thrown. She pondered over it. What could it have been? If lily hadn't thrown a spell to get out alive then maybe someone else? A glimpse of hope arrived, but then she pulled herself back down to earth. Barely anyone could escape the killing curse, let along fifteen year old girls."What.. what was that blue light you mentioned?" she asked curious. She wanted to know, she needed to know.

She nodded in agreement. She didn't want the kids at school when something like this had happened. She wanted the family home. She wanted them together. She soon glanced up. "A boy?" she asked a little shocked at a new prophecy. "But i thought we all checked for an uncoming war? There was nothing in the prophecys. But then prophecys are set to change as people do." she didn't like the idea of send al and james back to school. "The D.A? Well.. what do we do in the mean time?" she was sure going to hunt bellatrix down. But of course she would wait till after the week of family time, she felt his arm close in around her. She felt safe with him. "i love you too harry." she replied matching his soft tone.

[harrypotter]

"What.. what was that blue light you mentioned?" Ginny had asked him and Harry slipped into a slight trance, his mind now replaying the whole scene over again. Harry had killed before, it was his job to bring in dark wizards and witches, and at times when capture was not possible, they had to kill. But Harry never imagined having to kill his own daughter. There she was in front of him now, her wand aimed high at his chest as she spoke the words, "You're all dead to me." A tear softly slipped from his eye and he took a deep breath, trying not to break down in front of Ginny once again. "It was another spell, or something. I shot the curse, but then the green jet was followed by a blue one, and from the way it looked, the blue hit her first. Though I don't know what spell it could have been, even Prior Incantato can make it show. All it shows is the killing curse."

His thoughts were now turned from the previous night to the boy as she spoke. "But i thought we all checked for an uncoming war? There was nothing in the prophecys. But then prophecys are set to change as people do." "Yeah but this one is different, it seems someone has already broken into the Ministry and taken it. I've been having Hermonie check into it to see if she can find a trace." He told her, now looking off again down the hall. This boy, who ever he was, was going to need a lot of help, and though they probably wouldn't ever meet, Harry would be behind him every step of the way, just like Dumbledore and Sirius was for him.

"The D.A? Well.. what do we do in the mean time?" That was a good question. Should they start the Order up? or should they run to the Ministry? Things would be different now that Hermonie was in charge, but even at times she could get a little power crazy, and that was something he didn't need right then. "Start up the Order again. Move ourselves back to Number Twelve, and actually get a start in this war. Once we get the members we will have Hermonie and the Ministry declare the return of Bellatrix, force her out of hiding, and off to war we go." He sighed at the last bit. When would the wars end and peace actually be promised like it was suppose to be?

He smiled a bit as she snuggled into him, saying she loved him as well. He was glad she didn't kick his ass, and at the thought gave a nervous chuckle. He kissed the top of her head, rubbing her arm a bit where his hand laid.

[ginny]

She waited patiently for him to think back to it. It was strange to hear of a blue light along with a red one. But then not many survived the killing curse. Ginny was sure only harry had managed it because of the love his parents had for him. Ginny would never dream of hurting her children, but she guessed when it got to the state that you couldn't see who you once knew, then it wouldn't matter. Lily was too lost to be found, and now she would never be found. Maybe Ginny was giving false hope. Harry could have even seen it wrong. It could have just been them both trying to find something to explain it all. Searching for an answer that wouldn't be found. Or at least not yet. "Maybe another person was there? But then, how would they have managed to be there if Dom and Lily were in lilys room. Are you sure you didn't imagine it? Its a bit... unusual." she felt harsh having to tell harry he could have been seeing things. He'd just killed his own daughter and now she was destroying whatever hope that was left. It was better to just let go and go with the basic answer. It caused less pain.

She leant her head back. Another war to come? Why now? But of course if Bellatrix wanted some sort of war, then she would help harry give them one. If they had defeated them once then no doubt they could do it twice. Especially now that everyone was on their side. Everyone knew Harry never lied, and there was never a moment in Ginnys lifetime that she had thought Harry had lied. Maybe about his feelings, but nothing serious like a war. Even if she hoped this was some cruel joke about Lily she could already feel the empty hole. It would be there for the rest of her life she knew. The wonder of what could have happened. Now she knew how her mother felt. Especially when her mother found it hard to really speak about fred."Clearly someone doesn't want us to find out." she replied. "Or the boy already knows? I thought the person that the prophecy is about can be the only one to retrieve it? Thats what happened when we broke in for it?"

She shook her head. "No need. It mentioned in the article about Lily. I know one thing though. Jack Riddle owns the daily prophet. If he's just let out that Bellatrix is alive.... then who's side is he on?" that was something that had confused her."But then, i think people are more about Lily and the death eaters. It was only a small comment about the woman." She would admit she would have beat him to hell and back if she reacted another way. But this was going to be taken out on the Lestranges. She was going to take them down for all they had done to Lily. "Bellatrix is going to pay." she said in an usually cold tone.

[harrypotter]

"Maybe another person was there? But then, how would they have managed to be there if Dom and Lily were in lilys room. Are you sure you didn't imagine it? Its a bit... unusual." Ginny asked him. Harry sighed a bit at this thought. He was putting too much hope into that Lily was still alive and well, misguided and lost somewhere in the world. But the more he thought about it, the more he could see that she was really dead, and that the blue light was possibly his imagination kicking in to numb the effects of killing his own flesh. "No one else was there beside Me and Lily. I had sent Dom home shortly before along with my patronus to tell her father of the incident. Though I'm sure I wasn't imagining the light, it wouldn't be the first time I thought I saw something that wasn't really there." He knew her intentions were well, but that little piece of his heart was still hanging on to the hope that she was alive.

He sat there for a moment, now listening to his shattered heart beat softly in his chest. How it was still ticking, he didn't know. "Clearly someone doesn't want us to find out." Ginny piped up, his thoughts now focusing on her. "Or the boy already knows? I thought the person that the prophecy is about can be the only one to retrieve it? Thats what happened when we broke in for it?" Harry shrugged a bit. "I think i didn't look close enough, I was in a hurry to get home." He sighed a bit, pulling his knees to his chest as he sat there, draping his free arm over them.

He looked over at the Daily Prophet as she spoke about it mentioning Bellatrix's return. So this was what she was planning? Slipping in her return like a hidden message within his daughters wanted poster? He clenched his fist a bit, now starting to get angered. He nodded a bit at her explanation of how people looked at it. True, people would be more looking at a Potter being a Death Eater. "He's on his own side." Harry said softly, still a bit mad. "He's probably planning on over throwing her. He's crazier than her. Bellatrix looks like a Nun compared to Jack." It was true, Jack was farther down the rabbit hole than Bellatrix ever thought about going. He was bring up ancient magic that had not been used in over centuries. "Bellatrix is gonna pay." For some strange reason this brought a smile to Harry's face. "She will baby, she will."

[ginny]

Yes the more she considered it the less hope she had. No one could survive that curse. No one. She pushed it away. She didn't want to think about how Harry had killed their daughter. It was a hard subject and she knew when the prophet picked up on it Harry would be seen in two different ways. A murderer or a hero. It wouldn't go down well. She wasn't sure how everyone else would act. When she'd spoken to albus he had made it clear she was already dead to him. Now she really was. Now she had to be the one to tell Al and James what had happened. She was dreading it, but she knew she would have to play strong. She didn't want to be seen as a meltdown before a war. "Maybe it wasn't there." she replied, sadened about the matter. "Have you told Hermoinie? Maybe she can stop this from hitting the papers. Who knows what people will think? They already knew she was pregnant. It's going to give us all a bad name. Unless... this is what Jack Lestrange wanted? For us to be seen as murderers?" it was possible.

Ginny was sure her heart had stopped. The fact that all this was hit to her at once, and yet again she fought back tears that wanted to stream down. She hated crying in front of harry, let alone her family. She would save it for when she was on her own. Let herself think and break it all down into something she could cope with. She knew it wouldn't be the same between them. The urge of attacking him was still there, but she knew that Lily had begun the fight with him. She could have easily put the wand down and let him take her to the ministry. She'd pushed it too far. She was lost.

"How can you be more evil than Bellatrix?" she piped up. Bellatrix was almost as bad a voldemort she was sure. "Then that means it isn't just us versus her. Its Jack, Bellatrix and us against each other. This is going to be worse than the past war." she knew they would have to start planning in advance to catch up with the other two teams. "I should owl the school tonight." she said glancing over at parchment on the desk. She sighed a little. How could she put words to explain what was happening? She couldn't. She would wait till they were home, and tell them then. "I know she will. Im going to force her out of hiding, im going to kill her."