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Post by lydia on Dec 4, 2009 12:08:17 GMT -5
 SOMETIMES I FIND IT HARD• to believe there's someone else who could be •JUST AS MESSED UP AS MELily couldn't help but remember how easy life used to be. Or at least for a little girl the world surrounded sweets, games and getting what she wanted. Now? It was hate, war and pretty much death eaters that concerned her world. She was surprised to how things could change so fast and how one person coul deteriorate through a series of events. And look what was left, just another messed up girl with no life ahead of her. And that girl just happened to be Lily Potter.
Maybe the time off school she had taken wasn't long enough to forget what had happened and what will happen. Maybe she was better of dead. But here she was, with one big secret, and she needed to confide in at least one of the Potters right? Dominique hadn't been helpful, instead Lily got told to go kill her cousin. And on several occasions she failed, maybe something was stopping her? Love..? Possibly. So who was next to find out about Lily and her reasons to why she had left Hogwarts for nearly two months? James Potter of course. He was her eldest sibling, and just maybe he would be able to keep the grim secret. She wasn't completely sure, but it was better than just keeping it down. It wasn't like Dom was going to help anymore now was it?
Since her break, she'd calmed the whole death eater situation down, she was glad for once that her great aunt and uncle came around to letting her stay for a while. They weren't all that bad, but she managed to merely stand for some of the comments they said. But it had done the job, and for once Lily was grateful. She had of course claimed she was ill and had some rare illness to escape Hogwarts, and the time had come for her return, and all ready she had bumped into Jack Lestrange or Riddle... whatever. Things had been going so well, and he had come to rain on her parade. Typical.
She glanced up looking at the shrieking shack. She had already sent an owl, making her decision to invite James to meet her. The shrieking shack was almost always empty, so that was where she picked. At least if something went wrong there would be what, no whitnesses? So struggling to open the door (which eventually after a few kicks and pushes opened) she entered the isolated house, which was pretty much almost derelict. Heading over to the fireplace she gave a small easy curse which lit it up, sending a little warmth and light over to the area. Way to pick a month to tell, she thought taking a seat on the strange couch and waiting for James to arrive. If he even did.
WORDS ! 6161 with codes
OUTFIT ! CLICK
LYRICS ! sometimes by skillet
TEMPLATE ! PANIC! ITS LAUZ @ CAUTION
NOTES ! blah blah
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Post by padfoot on Dec 5, 2009 22:02:55 GMT -5
 the night things changed can't you see itTHE WALLS THEY PUT UP TO HOLD US BACK FELL DOWNit is a revolution so throw your hands up
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The days were getting colder as time went by, but today was by far one of the coldest he could remember all winter so far. It was just cold enough that Sirius had no intentions on running or practicing today. All he wanted to do, actually was stay in bed until he was supposed to meet with Kelsey later that day. He kept thinking about how much easier it would be to not have to wait to see her every day. When he could fall asleep to her face and wake up to it every morning. Unfortunately he was not seeing that happening any time soon. Or at least not soon enough, considering it was still the school year. And the fact that he really needed to save up more money if they were going to get a place of their own... But that was not a bother to him right now, only the fact that he was freezing in his bed could bother him.
So Sirius got up and took a shower, steam rolled out of the bathroom after him, who was now fully dressed in black jeans a white shirt and white hoodie. When he reached his bedroom, he was greeted by an open window, and an owl sitting in it. "God damn window..." he complained as he reached for the letter tied to the owls leg. Then he shooed the owl out of the window and shut it before any more cold could get in the dormitory. This was indeed a surprise, an owl that came to him rather than the breakfast table. Perhaps it was confused because Sirius never missed breakfast and today he had slept right through it? Either way, he was surprised because he was not expecting any mail. He gingerly tore open the envelope, taking time so he would not rip whatever its contents was. Then he pulled the letter out and unfolded it.
The letter surprised him, it was from Lily. He had not spoken to his younger sister in quite some time. He had hoped she might show up at the Christmas Ball, so she would be there to hear his news when he told the rest of his family. She had not shown up though, but he assumed she had gotten the information from someone somewhere. Maybe that was why she asked him to meet her at the Shrieking Shack later that afternoon? She was very vague, just telling him when and where to meet her. Sounded like maybe she was coming back to school, or maybe she just wanted to hang out with him. Either way, that was fine with him. He did have to admit he kind of missed having Lily around. No matter how much he found his family a constant annoyance he still felt better knowing they were around.
Pulling on his black boots and grabbing his leather jacket that he has worn for many winters in a row now, Sirius was going to go downstairs, get something to eat, and go meet Lily. He almost walked out the door when he turned around to grab a pack of Marlboro cigarettes off his bedside table. Couldn't forget those, now could he? Stupid bad habit, but an addiction non the less. When he got down to the Great Hall he grabbed a quick bite of lunch (because for once he had been lazy all morning, no run, no practice, no nothing but sleeping) and made sure to find Kelsey to tell her what his plans for the day were and that he promised to meet her for dinner and to hang out that night after. He kissed her goodbye and made his way out onto the grounds. There he made the quick move to light the first cigarette out of the new pack.
Smoke rings exhaled from his lips, but with the weather being so could if you did not know he had a cigarette, you might think it was only his breath he was exhaling. He finished that cigarette on the way to Hogsmeade, and decided to wait a few minutes before lighting a new one. His whole body could feel the cold through his clothing, but that was nothing new. He did not shiver and you would never have guessed he was nearly as cold as he was, if at all. Sirius was used to it being cold because when the air rushed past you when you fly, even if it was the hottest day of the summer, you can still get chills. Not just from the exhilaration of flying either, though sometimes that's all it is. When he reached the walk way up to the ancient old shack of a house, he pulled out the pack and lit a new cigarette. Filthy, filthy habit.
Sirius walked up to the door, and noticed that it was open, kind of. It had been pushed open with force that was obvious enough. He pushed it open, hoping it would not just fall off its rotting hinges as he did so, and looked around the home. "Lily?" he called, before he looked around the room and spotted his sister, who he smiled at, waiting for her to say something... Explain why she asked him to come here. If he did not want to know, he would not have come.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - -I'M PINNING LILYYY I AM DONE =]]] GRAMMY GOES TO TAYLOR SWIFT WE ARE IN THE SHRIEKING SHACK LOOKINGCLICK ME, CLICK ME!WORD SAYS EIGHT HUNDRED NINETY ONE. TEMPLATE BY VIOLETTE !? of CAUTION 2.0! GRAPHIC SKILLS TODREWFULLERFAN.COM>GALLERY>WALLPAPERS. I'VE GOTTA SAY notes on your posting job. |
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Post by lydia on Dec 6, 2009 22:01:34 GMT -5
SOMETIMES I FIND IT HARD• to believe there's someone else who could be •JUST AS MESSED UP AS ME
Things were changing a little too fast. The last thing a fourteen year old should have been worrying about was death eaters coming to kill her. But then again the last thing she should have been running from was motherhood. How was she meant to tell James? Well no she should have known telling james would have been easier than the whole family. That one she was dreading, but maybe they wouldn't take it so badly. Maybe James would direct her in the right direction, maybe he would walk away. She wasn't sure. Which one would he take worse? Being a death eater or being pregnant? If anything maybe shock would kill him or something.
Not that she wished James dead. No far from that. If she wanted him dead she could have done it before they had even come to school. She never was one to rely on family, but this time it was important, and this time it meant buisness. She wasn't completely sure on telling mum and dad the death eater buisness. She didn't want to go to azkaban. After all, now that she thought about it there were deaths she had caused that had gone on record. Why confide in her big brother? Maybe because big brothers were meant to make everything better. Maybe because she had that little glimmer of hope that she could get out of the position she seemed to be glued in.
She knew she was probably going to pay for telling what was going on to James. But she needed someone and James was one she put her full trust into. Sure her parents may have been the ideal ones to confide in, but they couldn't be at Hogwarts all the time and she needed someone who didn't really no Jack. James was the best option. Maybe she shouldn't come out with it completely straight, maybe he would have a heart attack of some sort if she did. But she decided small talk was the best option, even though she knew he knew she hated small talk. There was not much else she could do. It had to come out sooner or later, and sooner or later she would wind up dead.
Maybe she would play it of as just wanting to hang around with him. She could have used the excuse that she missed him but then wasn't that just putting it off. Her as fell into a small trance at the fireplace. She would have to tell everyone soon. Or she could have just wait till the gossip went around. it was a scary thought.What if everyone thought she was just another teenage whore. What if people thought she was making it uo? Well they would be in for a shcok. She could here name calling, Pregnant Potter. Oh how she would be dreading it. But she knew one thing. She could not let death eaters get a hold of her or the baby.
She glanced up as he entered. Tears almost filled her eyes, and she could feel hormones raging to be released. Maybe she would be just as hysterical as she had been telling asher. "James, confess something too me?" she announced. "Anything i would not no, because i think it wont be as bad as i have to tell you."
TAGGED ! James Potter
WORDS ! 710 with codes
OUTFIT ! CLICK
LYRICS ! sometimes by skillet
TEMPLATE ! PANIC! ITS LAUZ @ CAUTION
NOTES ! blah blah
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Post by padfoot on Dec 6, 2009 22:41:01 GMT -5
the night things changed can't you see itTHE WALLS THEY PUT UP TO HOLD US BACK FELL DOWNit is a revolution so throw your hands up
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Well, that was not the greeting he had expected. As soon as she walked into the door, she asked him to confess something. Something she would not know about. To him, that sounded like either: A. She already knew, and wanted to hear it from his mouth. Or B. She had something much, much worse to tell him in return. She looked upset, so he was betting on option B. But what could Lily have gotten into that was that bad? If she wanted him to tell her something, to make her feel better about telling him something, it had to be bad. He had hoped he could get away with hanging out with her, and catching up a little before dropping the bomb on his current relationship status on her, but apparently that would not work. Then again, he knew Lily pretty well, and knew she hated small talk. She was a direct person when it came to anything important.
So how was he going to put this? First he looked at her with a slightly puzzled expression on his face, and then he took another drag off his cigarette. God it felt good going down into his lungs in this cold air. It actually did warm him up and helped with the nerves he had been having for days. He just still felt shaky after what happened at the ball. Being confronted by Kelsey's father about their marriage had been... Well, not an experience he would ever want to repeat to say the least. "Well, that's not what I expected when I walked in." he said with a small smile on his face, smoke exiting his mouth with every syllable he spoke. "But how about a, Hey James, hows it been? Or something?" he said joking around with her, before realizing she looked kind of... Well, she looked upset. Now he wanted to know why.
The easiest way to get Lily talking, would be to answer her question. So that is what he did. "Tell you something you don't know, eh?" he said, looking down at the ground. He stepped further into the room, walking close to the fireplace, which she was sitting near. He puffed the cigarette again, nervous habit. He did not think Lily would take his marriage any better than the rest of his family obviously. Maybe worse, he did not know. But she seemed to have something pretty bad on her mind right now, and he wanted her to talk with him. Confide in him. The two of them were probably the most alike of all their siblings. They both had a bit of an alcoholism problem, and even though he had only slept with Kelsey, he had had a number of sexual partners other than that before. He knew Lily's reputation with girls, and he knew his. People honestly did not seem to believe Kelsey was his first...
"I'm married..." he said flat out. Just the way she would have done it. Just told the news, blurted it out before he could stop himself, before he changed his mind and decided to say something completely untrue. Or something true that would keep him from having to tell anyone what was really on his mind. James was really good at doing that, surprisingly enough. "To Kelsey LeBlanc, or... Well, Kelsey Potter now... We ran off and god married a few weeks before the Christmas Ball. I told the rest of the family there..." he took a deep breath of the cold air, and then took another drag off the cigarette burning away in his hand. He was going to need more of these, he could tell. Just by Lily's tension, and the way he felt now, having told her this. He hoped she would not hate him, he honestly thought he related closest to Lily out of his siblings. Even though he did not spend hardly any time with her. There was just some sort of connection.
Now he just needed Lily to tell him what was wrong with her. Because honestly, he knew there was something wrong. And if someone was fucking around trying to hurt his little sister, you best damn well know James Potter would do something about it. And even if that wasn't the case, he would do whatever he could to help her out. They may not be the closest siblings in the world, but he did care about her, and he could tell something was really bothering her right now. He sat down next to her, but did not look at her. He had actually sat down on the floor, he pulled up his knees to his chest and just smoked his cigarette, staring at the fireplace just like she was. "And if that was not a good enough confession for you to tell me whatever you don't want to tell me, I can come up with something worse." he said, finally glancing towards her.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - -I'M PINNING LILYYY I AM DONE =]]] GRAMMY GOES TO TAYLOR SWIFT WE ARE IN THE SHRIEKING SHACK LOOKINGCLICK ME, CLICK ME!WORD SAYS EIGHT HUNDRED AND TWENTY SEVEN. TEMPLATE BY VIOLETTE !? of CAUTION 2.0! GRAPHIC SKILLS TODREWFULLERFAN.COM>GALLERY>WALLPAPERS. I'VE GOTTA SAY I KINDA LIKE THIS POST. SIRIUS IS A SMART ASS. >< |
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Post by lydia on Dec 6, 2009 22:57:19 GMT -5
SOMETIMES I FIND IT HARD• to believe there's someone else who could be •JUST AS MESSED UP AS ME
She knew she should have gone with small talk but it was not going to work. Important things needed to be told, and Lilys life was probably at the edge right now. "Hey James, How has it been?" she said sarcastically, but of course that ended up hormones. They seemed to have made her a blatant, sarcastic girl recently. Her eyes gazed at the cigarette. She could have killed for one. Though doubted James would hand her one. It was a new habit she had aqquired when she found out, knowing it did both good and bad to her. She had of course ended up with trouble sleeping,s o waht was better than smoking to pass the time? It worked so to speak.
Lily was not going to take what James had been up too badly. He was what seventeen? He had his own life as Lily had hers. She was going to end up cutting her childhood short to be an adult. A big girl. She had always looked up to James, trying to follow with what he did but make it out that she did it because she wanted too. And here she ended up. Her little reputation did not help her either. She was sure plenty of people were expecting potter to get pregnant sooner or later.
Two words she had not really been expecting fell out his mouth. Married!? Married?! She did not no how to react, but in the end she burst out laughing. She could not help it, she was hysterical with laughter. How amusing her brother got married. To someone she did not know! She leaves for two months and her brother gets married. At least she knew she was not the only one in trouble. Well it would make James look like the angel and her the devil. "It was great, thanks for that" she said before it was finally her turn to tell him what was going on.
"James you are going to kill me. Literally." she said returning to her serious face. "i do not no what to say first." she guessed baby would be the best option. "Im two months pregnant to a werewolf." she felt like adding the werewolf bit in considering the kid could be a were wolf too. But just before he could slip into any stage of shock he was about to go into she added. "And im a death eater too, and bellatrix lestrange want to kill me and i do not know what to do. Im sorry" and soon enough she ended up crying all over again, just with axel.
[/color][/size][/blockquote][/blockquote][/center] TAGGED ! James Potter
WORDS ! 599 with codes
OUTFIT ! CLICK
LYRICS ! sometimes by skillet
TEMPLATE ! PANIC! ITS LAUZ @ CAUTION
NOTES ! blah blah
[/quote][/quote] |
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Post by padfoot on Dec 9, 2009 22:47:50 GMT -5
the night things changed can't you see itTHE WALLS THEY PUT UP TO HOLD US BACK FELL DOWNit is a revolution so throw your hands up
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After James had asked her what happened with normal greetings she had very sarcastically said, "Hey James, how's it been?" and he smirked at her. Typical, but actually not so much. She seemed more irritated than usual as she had said it, and he wondered what was causing his sisters mood change. Then when he took another drag off the cigarette he watched her eying it. Now way, he his sister taken up smoking? That was not something he wanted to hear. It was a bad enough habit for him and one of his best friends Michael Rodney, but he would hate to hear that his sister had taken up the nasty habit. Then again, knowing Michael well enough, he knew people only got that look in their eyes when they were having a nicotine craving, he had given people the same look before. "Don't tell me you smoke now, Lily." he said flat out, before puffing the cigarette once more. God he really needed to quit...
Then he went on telling her about getting married, without the lovely details about his little run in with her father at the ball. God that had been... an experience to say the least. If he never had something like that happen again he would be the happiest man on earth. After all, trying to act mature and calm when you're scared shitless was something that was hard to do. But he had done it all the same. Not well, mind you, but he had. When she final soaked up the information that he was married, she did the one thing that was farthest from what he expected. She laughed. She laughed hysterically. He felt like saying something like, Hey, where do you get off laughing at me? You don't think I can last as a married man? but in all honesty he did not expect her to think he could do it. After all, he was known as one of the most flirtatious guys at Hogwarts, why should that have changed in the previous two months of her absence?
Now it was her turn. He finished that smoke and flicked it into the fireplace. Maybe he would give the chain smoking a rest, give it a few minutes before the next one. Now it was time to listen to Lily, she had a story to tell, and obviously not the best of ones or why would she have wanted him to tell her something before she went. Hoping maybe, just maybe it was worse than what she was up to. Of course, she had only laughed at him, and he had let her. He did not say anything he could see how to some people that thought might be humorous. But he was sure him and Kelsey would be married forever, so he was not worried about what others thought of his decision. He had asked her if it was good enough, or if he needed to come up with something else. She said it was great, and thanked him. He assumed he was being thanked for the laugh, but he hoped she knew he was serious about everything he had just said.
Then she spoke, and he did not interrupt until she was finished, though there was a few parts there where he really, really felt like saying something. She took her time getting to it, forewarning him that he was going to kill her, which he doubted, and then saying she did not know where to start. That was completely unlike Lily, to not just jump right into whatever was on her mind. She never took the time for small talk, or anything like that. She was always very straight to the point. But when she finally told him what it was, he understood why she had not just jumped into it.
"Im two months pregnant to a werewolf." she had started out. That of course caught him off guard. His little sister, pregnant? She was only fourteen! This could seriously not be happening. The first thing he wanted to know was who's the dad? Because as soon as he found out this kid was in for it big time. James had no intentions of literally killing the boy, because he had no desire of spending life in azkaban. On the other hand, he was not letting the kid off guilt free, either. One of James good friends was a father, and only seventeen years old, so James could not discriminate. But he could be furious, this was his little sister after all! What she told him after that... Now that was a blow to the head.
"And im a death eater too, and bellatrix lestrange want to kill me and i do not know what to do. Im sorry" Death Eater?! No fucking way was his little sister a death eater. Impossible, no way in hell that was for real. But why would she have told him that if it was not real? She seemed scared enough, about everything, and she shortly broke down crying. Damn, he needed another cigarette right now, but instead he pulled his sister into a hug, embracing her tightly so she would feel at least a little safer. What was he supposed to do or say right now? How had she gotten herself into these situations? Better question was how was he going to help get her out of this. There was no way he could sit by and let it happen without doing anything about it.
"Lily, I promise it will be okay." was all he said at first, rubbing his hand up and down her shoulder trying to comfort her. "No one's going to hurt you. I promise... And as far as being pregnant is concerned, I'm here for you." Yes, that sounded good. She needed to calm down before he could really ask her anything important about this death eater business, but he assumed she was okay to answer questions about the baby. There were not that many kids around school it could be, considering she had said 'to a werewolf'. He just needed to know which one...
"Lily, who is the father?" he asked calmly, not saying aloud that he was going to hunt him down and interrogate him himself. Mostly because Lily already probably expected him to do so. He just hoped it was not someone he hated, because then he might be risking life in azkaban, and losing Kelsey forever. But he needed to do what he could for Lily. For now, he sat there holding her close him, in attempts to stop her tears and make her feel safe.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - -I'M PINNING LILYYY I AM DONE =]]] GRAMMY GOES TO TAYLOR SWIFT WE ARE IN THE SHRIEKING SHACK LOOKINGCLICK ME, CLICK ME!WORD SAYS ONE THOUSAND ONE HUNDRED AND TWELVE. TEMPLATE BY VIOLETTE !? of CAUTION 2.0! GRAPHIC SKILLS TODREWFULLERFAN.COM>GALLERY>WALLPAPERS. I'VE GOTTA SAY LOOOONG POST. I'M HAPPY. LOL... HOPE IT WAS GOOD ENOUGH THOUGH. |
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Post by lydia on Dec 11, 2009 7:37:38 GMT -5
SOMETIMES I FIND IT HARD• to believe there's someone else who could be •JUST AS MESSED UP AS ME
Irritated was one way to put it, she could go with that. Claiming she was merely just irritated. Of course scared, confused and distraught were a little better. At least soon enough she could be moody and blame hormones... well those stupid little body drugs had already poisened her and taken control. She was a mood swinger, not always had she been one. Maybe a tantrum here and a screaming match there but never moody, so this... this was just completely new, and she knew it was going to be for the next nine months of her life. Nine months of hell. At least up till the second month it had all gone fine. Not knowing anything about it, not being sick in the mornings, not being put off food just because the look or smell made her feel sick. She took her eyes of the cigarette to land them on her brothers. "So what! I can smoke if i want too, besides you do it, hypocrit."
James getting married? She was not sure whether to believe him or if he was pulling just a joke. He seemed pretty serious, but was he actually serious? She was not sure. But the idea made her laugh, cheered her up for those split through moments. Shone a little light down the black tunnel she had landed in. But then it went out leaving her back in the tunnel of no hope. Blah, she hated herself right now. She had hated herself for quite the while. But at least James did something stupid. Maybe that would ease of mum and dad before she told them? Well at least let them boil their anger on him if they were angry about the dilemma. She did of course wonder what this girl had done to get James under her finger? She knew James's reputation.. it had clearly rubbed off onto lily. She looked up to James and well here she was running back to him because there was trouble.
Her eyes fell to the fire place, watching the rest of the cigarette burn into nothing. Damn. She was craving one but she knew it was her turn to speak. Maybe hoping that James' story was worse was a little foolish. He had done something... extreme? If it wasn't for her problem crushing it down it would have been seen as stupid. Idiotic. Totally un-James. She was curious to who this Kelsey was. Well wasn't she in for the best time of her life meeting the Potters. Oh and you can't forget the sister in law pregnant death eater. She was sure that would go down well. She chuckled to herself coldly. Oh well at least if she didn't like the girl she could kill her, now that would be fun.
Besides that being pregnant fell out. She was instantly waiting for James to maybe hit her? No he wouldn't hit her, he didn't have the guts. Hit axel? Yeah that sounded about right. She was waiting to be interrogated. Who what when and why. Yep that sounded about right for her family, if they were even still family. She hardly was there anymore. Staying at 'friends' and just practically drifting away from it. All that was left was the name 'Potter' and if she got married it would cut of the ties. Ha, marriage? No way. She was happy being miss independant, especially now that there was a baby involved. Sure Axel could have as much as he wanted to do with the child, but lily herself believed she could do it alone, sort of. She'd managed to be a death eater? How was that not harder than bringing up a child into the world? If she even did. There was still the chance that Bellatrix would hunt her down and kill her.
She knew he wouldn't believe she was a death eater. It took a while for herself to realise just what she had become. She had gone through the phase of death eater mode several times. And when Bellatrix told her to go murder Dominique Weasley, she had agreed, and in turn attempted it several times. What was the count? Four maybe five times? She had shocked herself when she actually scarred her cousin. And then the thought of killing James and Albus was pretty tempting actually. She had thought about it on occasion, but could not bring herself to do it. Was that wrong? Maybe? Probably. She kept silent about the cruel thoughts that had crossed her mind in time. James wouldn't believe her, maybe he would. Maybe he already knew? No dominique wouldn't tell him would she?
The hug felt nice, better than Axel's hug surprisingly. But this was her big brother. She was meant to go running to him when a boy pissed her about wasn't she? Thats what normal little sisters did, but look here she was laying problems on him, one being he could get himself killed over if he did something stupid. Well... Jack had threatened to kill her, she was still alive right? Bellatrix was going to kill her, there was no doubt about that. She had afterall betrayed the woman three times now? She doubted there would be a fourth time of forgivness. Well that woman did not really know of anything that had happened since she had left the school. That was her cut out of it all. Lily knew if she attempted that again, Jack would drag her back. He had already said so. She should have stayed away. Hidden herself from the world, never to be seen again. Ha, she could only wish for that.
James's words were a comfort sort of. "Dont promise something you cant keep" she began, "They will get me." she added before attempting to stop crying. It didn't work, but it did of course help calm her down a little. She should have known he would ask. Axel already knew he was going to be dead. Blah what was the worse that could happen. "Axel..." she began realising she didn't even know his last name. "The gryffindor one." she had forgotten to ask his last name... well she would make sure to catch it next time. Maybe James knew?
[/color][/size][/blockquote][/blockquote][/center] TAGGED ! James Potter
WORDS ! 1218 with codes
OUTFIT ! CLICK
LYRICS ! sometimes by skillet
TEMPLATE ! PANIC! ITS LAUZ @ CAUTION
NOTES ! blah blah
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Post by padfoot on Dec 15, 2009 21:19:58 GMT -5
the night things changed can't you see itTHE WALLS THEY PUT UP TO HOLD US BACK FELL DOWNit is a revolution so throw your hands up
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First words out of her mouth after him sounding angry at her for smoking was that she could if she wanted and he did it so telling her not to made him a hypocrite. In his mind, he was not a hypocrite, he just wanted her to have more common sense in doing things that were bad for her body than he did. Because he has done all sorts of bad for keeping you alive type of things, for example drinking, smoking and even drugs in the further back past. It was all stuff that took him the wrong way and he hated to see that happen to his sister. She should have had more common sense than him, girls do after all, right?
Of course, now he felt bad about snapping, so he looked at her. "Let me rephrase." he said looking over at her. "I shouldn't have started, I wish I hadn't. I would prefer if you didn't have all my bad habits." he looked back at the ground, and thought about lighting up another one. She looked seriously stressed out, so maybe she could actually use one right about now too. But the newly obtained information that she was pregnant changed that... She really needed to quit because of that. Even he knew that you shouldn't smoke or do much of anything like that while you're pregnant. But he figured if she asked him for one, he would probably give her one anyway, just because he really wanted another one right now.
Stupid bad habits. Then he had hugged her closer, rubbing his hand up and down her back, calming her down. She told him not to make promises he could not keep. That Bellatrix would get her no matter what he did basically. Well, they would just have to see about that one. Anyone that fucked with his family, was barking up the wrong tree. He did not care to deal with Death Eaters much, but if it meant keeping his sister alive, for herself and her unborn baby, he would do whatever it took. And he was sure Kelsey would agree for him to do so, and understand why he felt he had to when he told her.
"Even if I don't stop anything, I will be in their way until they get me out of the way. Trust me." he told her softly, trying to make her feel even the tiniest bit safer. He did not really know the extent of the trouble she was in, but it couldn't be good if she said she was a Death Eater. That was going to be... interesting to think about later. And he will be thinking about it later, and for a long time. He knew it. His family was in trouble and that would be the only thing on his mind for days, weeks and months to come. Especially months... Until his little niece or nephew was born...
Now all he was waiting for was to know the name of this guy who got his sister into this scenario. Of course, there was almost no way he was the only one responsible. Neither one of them had been being careful that night it seemed. He hoped it was not someone she regretted being with, because that would make having to deal with him all that much more worse now that she was pregnant. And he sure as hell hoped that boy better be planning to stick through this with Lily, or there would definitely be some kids head being beaten into the side of the castle.
When she told him who the father was though, he had to stop and think for a few minutes. There was no way that Axel was the father. She said the Gryffindor one, so there had to be another person in Gryffindor by that name. Right? Axel was one of James closest friends, how was it that he would come to sleep with his sister? And get her pregnant?! Well, he definitely had some talking to do, that was for sure. James was going to find out exactly how this had come to be, and he was not going to be very quiet or nice about it. It just wasn't in his nature to do so.
"You're... he said pausing for a second, thinking about it for just a second longer and continuing. "You're absolutely sure it's Axel?" James asked her softly, not loosening his grip in the hug he had her in. She was still upset, and this conversation was bound to bring the tears back. Especially since she was pregnant, he was sure she would be a little more crazy than normal... But he had to find out what was going on here, first off, he did not know Axel had been a werewolf. Second, how could Axel do that, knowing damn well that was one of his best friends sisters? That was what blew him away the most.
Taking one arm from around her, he stuck it in his jacket pocket and took out another cigarette and the lighter and lit one up. God damn bad habits, but it was good for one thing. Keeping him calm and sane.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - -I'M PINNING LILYYY I AM DONE =]]] GRAMMY GOES TO TAYLOR SWIFT WE ARE IN THE SHRIEKING SHACK LOOKINGCLICK ME, CLICK ME!WORD SAYS EIGHT HUNDRED SEVENTY THREE. TEMPLATE BY VIOLETTE !? of CAUTION 2.0! GRAPHIC SKILLS TODREWFULLERFAN.COM>GALLERY>WALLPAPERS. I'VE GOTTA SAY DECENT POST... NOT MY BEST. |
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Post by lydia on Dec 15, 2009 21:58:42 GMT -5
SOMETIMES I FIND IT HARD• to believe there's someone else who could be •JUST AS MESSED UP AS ME
Well aparently smoking was not a habit James wanted Lily to have but it was better than doing a Bellatrix and going on some sort of murdering spree. Wait no, she had already done that one and burnt down the pub while she was at it. If bellatrix didn't get her the ministry would, even if their aunt was the minister of magic, she knew she was going down and it was only a matter of time before she got dragged under, somewhere she couldn't get back up. How would James react to her killing people? She was certain he would turn her in, everyone else would, Lily knew if seh hadn't betrayed Bellatrix the second time then she would have lived, but times had changed, and Lily was waiting to be thrown into the sea where she knew she would drown.
"I don't have all of your bad habits, i have my own too as you can guess" she muttered back not wanting to start an argument over what she could and couldn't do. "Your almost as bad as axel." she added on the end. He promised to quit for the baby but she had already brought up that he wouldn't and he admitted to that. How could she? She couldn't. Not now. Not with Bellatrix just waiting for that chance to go in for the kill and Lily knew it would be slow and painful. Merlin she was dreading that day and could on prey that it never came.
Then came a dawning thought, what if James got killed? It would be her fault, everything would. Wait what if she killed James? The all of a sudden the water works came back on she began crying once more. "what if you die! " she began. "I'd rather die, im going to azkaban anyway i don't want you to die" she most likely did sound like a small child, but thats all she was a fourteen year old girl being forced to grow up fast. She wasn't prepared to be a mum, she wasn't prepared to be a death eater and she knew she would soo have the choice of Azkaban or death, and death seemed like a better option.
"everythings my fault, im going to be alone or dead" she cried some more, it was more the realisation of the fact she knew the family wouldn't side with her or at least most of the family wouldn't. She was going to be disowned, she wouldn't go to hogwarts and she would end up as insane as that wicked bellatrix lestrange. Merlin she felt sick, but she kept it down and she clung on to her brother. She didn't want to let go. She would have rather died there and then but karma wasn;t going to go easy on her. It was biting her on the ass, hard.
It seemed like James didn't believe it was Axel, Lily knew why. They were close. It was her own fault for lying to Axel, but then Axel''s fault for getting her drunk in the fist place. There was always going to be the blaming, and Lily was willing to set the blame to neutral. It was both of theirs, an acident and she could only hope the aftermath came out better than she foresaw it. Was she sure it was Axels? "Yes! It was a few weeks before him that i last slept with somebody and Axel was my last. The dates add up and everything. Im going to get fat and ugly and then die. What the fuck do i do james?!" she began crying all over again. She already felt tired from it all.
She hadn't noticed James light up till she could smell it, and almost instantly when she noticed she snatched it from his hands and began smoking it herself. Nicotine was good, life was bad. She began once more attempting to calm herself down. Was it working? Not so well.
[/color][/size][/blockquote][/blockquote][/center] TAGGED ! James Potter
WORDS ! 842 with codes
OUTFIT ! CLICK
LYRICS ! sometimes by skillet
TEMPLATE ! PANIC! ITS LAUZ @ CAUTION
NOTES ! blah blah
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Post by padfoot on Jan 4, 2010 15:13:06 GMT -5
the night things changed can't you see itTHE WALLS THEY PUT UP TO HOLD US BACK FELL DOWNit is a revolution so throw your hands up
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Lily went on to say that she did not have all of his bad habits, she had her own as well. Yes, that did seem to be true but he still did not want her smoking. She really should not be to start with, and being pregnant on top of that would not help anything at all. Of course, that might even make her crave the nicotine even more but it would be the day hell froze over that James gave his pregnant little sister a cigarette. He would not approve of that at all, and he needed to quit himself, but he wasn't the one that absolutely had to. Lily was. Hopefully her little addiction was not as bad as his, because then it would surely be a hard thing to give up. Then she tagged on that he was as bad as Axel. That just killed him. Right now, he did not even want to hear his friends name.
When he told her that he would help her in anyway he could, she exploded. What if he died, she asked. She said she would rather die because she was going to Azkaban anyway. Which he figured was probably true considering what she had told him about her being a death eater, but he was not going to worry about that right now. "Lily, seriously, even if that's true, you and the baby deserve a chance. I don't know the extent of all this bull shit, but even if you did the worst crimes in the world, the baby deserves a chance. And I'm going to make sure it gets that chance." he said, and it was true. Even though he should not be so worried, after all it is not his baby she was carrying, it was still his little niece or nephew and Sirius wanted to give it a chance at life. If he sat aside and let someone kill his sister and her baby he would not be able to live with himself.
"I know you are not ready to be a mum. And I know sure as hell that Axel is not ready to be a dad. But I will help you out as much as I can... And I'm sure Kelsey will too." he said as he kept pulling her closer in the hug trying to calm her down. She looked on the verge of tears again and he hated to see her crying and looking so vulnerable. It just did not seem right to him for some reason, his whole family was built of very strong individuals and she had always been one of them. He knew she was just scared now, and hell if he was a teenage girl and pregnant he would be too! "everythings my fault, im going to be alone or dead" she said suddenly and then cried some more. He wanted so much to have something better to tell her, like that it would be alright, and he had already tried that. She knew as well as he did (probably better) that it might not be. That something had to come of all this, and she had to be prepared to accept it.
When he asked her if it was absolutely sure it was Axel, that there was no possibilities that it was someone else, she looked at him in almost disbelief. She said that of course it was him, there had not been anyone for weeks before and not at all after. Which was reassuring at first, but then he had to remember once again that he was one of his good friends and he had slept with his fourteen year old sister! And then Lily got upset saying she was going to get fat and ugly and and then die. Then she asked him what she was should do. He honestly kept thinking over and over that he was not the person she needed to be talking to about this, that it was definitely a better area for his friend Michael. Michael had been through a lot and has a two year old son of his own, and would be much more help on the pregnant and babies side of the scenario. But as for the rest of it, James did not think that anyone would be much help for her. Honestly, how many times does something like this come about? Not very many he would assume.
"All I can say is let me help you. I have a friend you might want to meet too... And as for Axel... I'm going to have to talk with him but not any time soon or he might be facing death a lot sooner than you think you are." he said the part about Axel rather dark and cold for his usual personality. Being angry was not usually the way James was, he tried to be the easiest going person in the world with most things, but this for some reason was setting him over the edge. he knew it was not only Axel's fault, but it sure as hell felt like it was right now. Then before he was paying attention he had barely lit his cigarette before he went to take a second drag and it was snatched up from him. Lily had taken it from him almost instantly upon lighting it. He rolled his eyes, "Common Lil. You can't keep smoking now..." he said softly, but then instead of taking it back, he took out another and lit it for himself. She could keep that one, but he did not want to be giving out anymore to her. It was a protective older brother thing, and it was not going to change.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - -I'M PINNING LILYYY I AM DONE =]]] GRAMMY GOES TO TAYLOR SWIFT WE ARE IN THE SHRIEKING SHACK LOOKINGCLICK ME, CLICK ME!WORD SAYS NINE HUNDRED AND FIFTY SEVEN! TEMPLATE BY VIOLETTE !? of CAUTION 2.0! GRAPHIC SKILLS TODREWFULLERFAN.COM>GALLERY>WALLPAPERS. I'VE GOTTA SAY IT WAS OKAY =\ SORRY IT TOOK SO LONG, I ONLY HAVE LIKE 1 DAY OFF A WEEK RIGHT NOW. |
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Post by lydia on Jan 6, 2010 20:40:33 GMT -5
SOMETIMES I FIND IT HARD• to believe there's someone else who could be •JUST AS MESSED UP AS ME
Last thing she wanted was to have her familys life in her hands, which of course she knew Bellatrix at the end of the day would use her against her own family. Lily might have been strong, but she had tried to kill dom on too many occassions. What if she turned on James, Albus or even Roula? She'd probably end up doing it if she lost complete control all over again. She didn't want to loose siblings over the whole ordeal. And her parents? They would surely disown her, that would be of course after her father said his piece of mind. All that he had worked, suffered and fought for was all going down the drain because Lily Potter was stupid enough to get kidnapped and brainwashed by a Lestrange. How stupid could she have been? But then she had always forced in her individuality. Well she was sure she was very individual now.
"Yes because mum and dad are going to keep their death eater daughter in the house along with her baby." she muttered sarcastically rolling her eyes. That was something she highly doubted. She doubted her family would ever even speak to her again... well except James, he clearly was up for helping her out. She just needed to let it of her chest. Maybe that was what forced her to speak to him. He was the eldest and big brothers were meant to make things all alright, well clearly, she had gone too far to clear up the past. But the future? Maybe there was still hope after all. She felt like she had hit the rock bottom of her life, but infact she knew she had hit rock bottom. She knew it was all over whether she lived or not.
She sighed. "Kelsey wont even like me" she complained. She had never really been one to get along with Al and James's girlfriends, and now that James was married, she highly doubted it would start now. "Its not fair." she paused. "Lifes not fair, and its not fair to put everything on you" she knew rather little about Kelsey Leblanc. Only the fact her father was a loyal death eater and Bellatrix? Seemed to have something to do with Kelsey herself, she looked up to her elder brother. "Kelsey Leblanc?" she clarified just incase she had got it wrong. Lily knew things she probably shouldn't perhaps that was the reason Bellatrix Lestrange was persistant on keeping the girl in line, or at least Jack for that matter.
She sighed trying to calm herself back down. Stopping the tears wiping the rest away. Before she knew it the cigarette was in her hand and she had already taken two rather huge reassuring drags hoping it would make everything better. She knew it would merely calm her craving down. She heard james speak. She knew he would want to help. It was his niece or nephew that he was willing to give a chance. Lily probably not so much, but she would rather have the baby and die than die with it."Fine, help me" she agreed. As for a friend, who in the world would she want to meet now? "A friend? Who?" she asked, being cautious like always. She knew axel was in for a shock, Axel even knew that James would be after him sooner or later. She took another drag. "I'll quit after this one... or maybe tomorrow." she qued in. Even axel wanted her too quit. She calmed down letting a silence settle only to turn around and say, "Bellatrix is going to make me kill you. I know she will."
[/color][/size][/blockquote][/blockquote][/center] TAGGED ! James Potter
WORDS ! 785 with codes
OUTFIT ! CLICK
LYRICS ! sometimes by skillet
TEMPLATE ! PANIC! ITS LAUZ @ CAUTION
NOTES ! blah blah
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